I cannot remember the last time i saw my muse- she somehow disappeared while i was busy packing up my life and belongings during the Great Move of 2011. Perhaps i accidently folded her into the box of beads and art supplies where she spent the last four months in a dark damp storage unit. Or maybe she has run off again to Paris to sip Pastis 51 and hang out at the Louvre.
These past few months have flown by since the move from the Witch City to Virginia. Most of it spent unpacking boxes, the paralyzing reality of a sick father, caring for an old incontinent cat and the perpetual search for a job. A real job- if there is such a thing. After applying for at least 300 jobs online, i am pretty certain most are surreal at this point. That is 300 resumes, cover letters and tedious redundant applications required to be filled out completely including everyplace you have worked, addresses, phone numbers, bosses, salary and pretty much every detail except for a sample of DNA, which i am sure would be required if i applied for the government jobs my parents keep reminding me about. (No need to remind them that their daughter probably has an FBI file documenting the activities of her domestic terrorist cats along with her borrowing Motorcycle Diaries from the library during the Bush regime.) During my father's moments of dementia he will ask if i have applied to work at Bethlehem Steel. I must be in a Seinfeld episode. Perhaps i will work for J. Petterman or the Yankees.
The insane thought of going through the tedious and expensive process of getting yet another acupuncture license- this time in Virginia... or maybe DC plays in my head over and over. Do i want to start another acupuncture practice all over again... Be self-employed again? Or should i settle for that $9 an hour job? This is beginning to sound like a John Prine song.
My addiction to hunting for a job seems to have triggered an intervention from my husband. He has the patience of a saint most of the time. But everyone has their breaking point. "Enough- stop trying so hard and the job will appear!" And so i have promised to stop looking for a bit. Take time to chill and enjoy life. (Could someone please remind me how to do that.) I may need to find a 12 step program to keep me from searching the internet everyday for THAT job.
Will Craigslist, Career Builder, Higher Eds Jobs, etc. even notice that i stopped visiting them with resumes everyday, including weekends and holidays? Happy to say i will not miss Career Builder taunting me with emails of expired job listings. "Hi, I'm Elliot from Career Builder and NASA is interested in you. Please click below to apply for the job." And of course, i click- and end up on a "Sorry the listing for this job is expired." webpage. Who hires those people at Career Builders?
Last night after my first 5 hours of not even peeking at Craigslist for a job i saw a shadow out of the corner of my eye. ... there she was in her infamous harem pants with bells, Dancing to the music in the kitchen with the cats.
Later i noticed that she ordered colored wire, bells and beads online and sent me the bill. I am hoping somewhere there is a bottle of Pastis 51 with my name on it too.
Sly and the Family Stone DANCE TO THE MUSIC